My church has no walls

It consists of those little everyday things; doing what I can for the people in my life. It is in the kindness of strangers, the love of my family. It is being thankful for what I have and appreciating the beauty all around me--a laughing child, birds chirping, sunsets. It is believing in the good of mankind and contributing my part to make the world a better place. It is having faith that there is a master plan; that everything happens for a reason; that I will never be given a challenge that I can't handle. It is standing in awe of all that he has created, and feeling his love in my heart as I gaze at the blue sky above. My god is too big to fit into one religion.

"..................Next?........."

I did not get a spot in the nursing program at SUU this semester. I only cried for 1/2 an hour. Then I decided to crash my own pity-party and start making plans. I registered for classes this semester; a full load (16 credit hours) and chose classes that would diversify my application for next semester:

Medical Terminology--required for pre med but not for nursing, and since I have 10+ years in the medical field, it should be easy.

Spanish-- begining level, but it is a college class so it will be challenging. And, having some spanish conversational skills will look good on that magic nursing program application.

Thinking and Listening Critically-- This is one of the suggested classes for the nursing program; you can choose this class or Humanities. I took Humanities, so now I am taking this one. Then I will have BOTH classes (That will show them how ambitious I am!)

Stats--The math class that has not yet yielded anything higher than a B-, maybe the third time is a charm..........

Intro to Visual Art-- just for fun.

I was pretty upset at first. I ran in to one of my friends at the local coffee shop the next morning (she got a spot, and I am happy for her) and she helped me feel better about it. Really this was not the best time for me to start. I need to work full time for a little longer for reasons some of you know. She offered to help me with the application essay and let me borrow her spanish and terminology books. I also talked to my parents and they reminded me how tough I am. Dave gave me his big shoulder to cry on and bought me some ice cream. I have a new resolve.

On Saturday morning the college radio station broadcast a motivational speech given by Professor Martin ( a well known motivational speaker, I'm guessing) and to make a long story short, he said (very eloquently) that he never heard "NO", he just heard "Next". How very motivating!

Friends

As I get older I find that the need to connect with my past grows stronger. I am so different from the girl I was in High school, so I don't really understand the longing I have to reconnect with old friends. Part of it may be that they all contributed a little part of the woman I am today. Part of it sadness for the fact that I lost touch with them in the first place. I am a sentimental fool; that much has not changed.

Maybe I am not as different as I thought I was. I hope that I am a lot smarter. I know I am not as naive. The world has taught me to be cautious with my optimism. I still love a good laugh. I keep only a few close friends-but to them I am fiercely loyal. My family is my top priority. My husband is my best friend and he knows how to make me smile no matter how angry I am. I still have a nervous giggle.

I guess that reconnecting with old friends reminds me of all the ways I am still the same, and at the same time shows me how far I have come. It is an enigma. I need to be reminded that once I wandered the streets of Park City, singing songs from Grease at the top of my lungs, not the slightest bit embarrassed that I was out of tune.

Application to Date my Daughter

Dave found an application for potential boyfriends to fill out. It includes such questions as "Do you have access to a van/truck/station wagon?" and "If you answered yes, why are you not running?". His favorite one was "Just so you know, if you make my daughter cry, I will make you cry--do you agree?" I laughed when he showed me that he had printed 10 copies and put them on his clipboard. It is still sitting by his chair. I think he's serious.

Heart break

Well.......it happened. Heather came bursting in the door last night and fell right into my arms sobbing. Her boyfriend broke up with her by text message.


Oh, how it brought back memories of my own heartaches. I was in 9th grade the first time some stupid boy broke my heart. His name started with a C and ended in -ody. I still remember sitting on my bed with my mom's arms around me, sobbing until my throat hurt. The was the first of many broken hearts. A stream of boyfriends and hopeless crushes plays in my mind. I was such a silly girl, I still am. Though those break ups were painful, they have shaped me into the person I am today. They are part of becoming a woman. And, I must say I can look back at those broken hearts ans smile about most of them. What doesn't kill you makes you stronger.

Heather will learn from this pain. She will grow into a woman. And what is up with this boy sending her a text message to deliver the bad news? What a chicken! I wonder what this generation is learning about communication and relationships when they do 90% of their communication on Facebook and text messages?!?! Maybe I am just too old to get it.